What would happen if you had – No Facebook, No X, No Instagram, No TikTok?
Would you fall apart or would it be a relief?
It may be difficult to answer that question because you may feel divided. You might feel lost without the constant connection to what’s going on ‘out there’. On the other hand, think about how it would feel to have free time and what you’ve been longing to do or try out but never had the time to do it.
We’ve all heard that social media is not good for us, and this became very real during the covid lockdowns. While social media provided a link to friends, family and the world for many, others quickly sank into depression due to the impact of the negative side of social media. So isn’t it about time we looked at our relationship with the social media juggernaut objectively?
I was slow to begin using social media because there was so much about it that felt really off to me. Re-watching the documentary “The Social Dilemma” brought back to me many of the reasons why I had hesitated for so long. Now I link many platforms with my business but recently I’ve been rethinking that relationship and asking whether it’s really worth the cost.
Have you considered your relationship with social media, so you are clear about how you use it and your expectations of it? Have you thought about limiting the time you spend, or the people and businesses you connect with?
Many people use social media to avoid an empty moment. They are not comfortable being in the ‘gap’. As a Spiritual Adventurer it’s essential to hang out in that gap to remain connected to your True Self.
“Where there is emptiness – true creativity fills the space.” ~ Peter Brook
But for many it goes much deeper. Like all addictions they become hooked by the manipulative methods adopted by the platforms to keep them scrolling and this leads to a greater and greater need for more. As with any other addiction, that’s not an easy thing to change. Do you know whether your relationship has reached that level?
That instant boost of happiness we crave and get from scrolling through social media is dopamine, the feel-good hormone, getting activated in our brains. This neurotransmitter is responsible for our pleasure, and the moment we feel delighted by looking at a meme or a post, dopamine is released making us feel happy if only for a moment.
Is dopamine addictive? In a word, YES.
Spending hours on social media leads to screen induced dopamine addiction. In addition, this mindless scrolling causes brain atrophy which results in low levels of happiness. And this fuels the need for more and more dopamine to counteract the deficit and make us feel happy again. It’s a vicious cycle.
Coming right on the heels of widespread criticism of social media platforms for promoting untruths, or at the least allowing them to circulate through the community and firing up hatred as a result, movies like ‘The Social Dilemma’ are forcing us to reassess our relationship with social media and question just how much of a dangerous effect it is having on us.
Your Social Media Relationship
Are you curious what it would be like to disconnect? Do you wonder how difficult that would be for you?
The following questions will help you gain clarity about the relationship you have with social media and help you decide whether you need to make changes.
The Social Media Unhook Exercise
Consider what your experience is when you are on social media.
Answer these questions for each different platform you use. Notice if the answers for each differ. You may find that one platform undermines you while others do not.
Take time with each question. If you find you want to skip over any question, pause, and force yourself to examine your response to that question in depth. Your answer is likely to be very revealing as this indicates the question triggers you.
Do you use social media to:
- Fill time?
- Whenever you have a free moment?
- When you feel nervous or unsure?
- To show others how great your life is?
- Are you looking for validation?
- To stalk someone?
- From a feeling of obligation?
- Does peer pressure drive you to join in?
What effect does it have on your emotions?
What effect does it have on your thoughts?
What do you ‘discover’ about others on social media?
- Are they having more fun than you? Are they more successful? Sexier, younger, funnier, more photogenic?
- What is the bottom line about how you use social media?
- How do you feel when you shut it down?
- Do you check messages or feed whenever you hear that little buzz as something new is posted.
What about if you DO NOT use social media?
Whether you use social media or not we are ALL affected by it because it now drives so many attitudes, beliefs and actions across society, influencing government policies and societal attitudes. So even when we don’t use social media ourselves it manages to have a huge impact on us anyway.
If you don’t use social media, examine why not in a world that is driven by the latest activity.
Have you noticed yourself being influenced by social media? How did this happen?
I hope this exercise helps you decide whether your relationship with social media is healthy or not. If you haven’t watched “The Social Dilemma” yet, go ahead and DO IT!
